Mindfulness is definitely having its moment, and for good reason. We need mindfulness more than ever in our busy too fast lives.
But.
But, there is a case to be made for mindfulness’s friend Curiosity. Mindfulness is one of several qualities or attributes that Buddhists propose as helpful mindsets. Here’s why I think curiosity can be even more helpful than mindfulness.
Why Curiosity?
According to psychologists, adopting a mindset of curiosity can foster more inner peace, self-acceptance, kindness and better communication. How? The first is that curiosity can interrupt judgment of any kind, but most importantly, judgment of the self (particularly self criticism).
When we get curious, we aren’t too far off from how infants (of all species) interact with the world. They are both brave, excited and without expectation. I tell myself to think of curiosity as encountering the world like a kitten, scampering after something. Where will it go? What will it do? In that curiosity, I’m not quite seeking to put it into one category or another (whether it is bad or good) but to get more information.
How Curiosity Differs from Mindfulness
Curiosity isn’t the same thing as mindfulness. In fact, I’d argue that learning to adopt a mindset of curiosity first might help with the other great Buddhist attributes, like mindfulness, friendliness (metta), and others.
Mindfulness asks that you watch your actions. It asks that you notice where you are. The idea of mindfulness is that it brings you to a “present sense awareness.” Which, of course, is a fantastic approach. Except if every noticing is accompanied by criticism. Remember that when the Dali Lama was asked about how to improve low self-esteem he was a little perplexed.
So, keep mindfulness in the context of the culture that created it – one that doesn’t trade in the same deluge of negative mind chatter.
How This Plays Out in Life
Imagine the following two scenarios as mindful dialogue. As for the first scenario: I am sitting on my couch. I am feeling how soft my Costco stretchy pants are and my comfy tank from my friend Jen. I am feeling full from my silly dinner of hummus from Zoe’s Kitchen and guac from the back of the fridge. I am looking forward to going to bed in a few minutes, as I have a great day planned for tomorrow.
That would be a mindful experience of my present sense.
Here’s the more likely scenario: I am sitting on my couch (I should have run today, why I am always so lazy?). I am feeling how soft my Costco stretchy pants are (I should really get a better job and afford better clothes) and my comfy tank from my friend Jen (why did I forget to text her this afternoon? Why am I always forgetting things?). I am feeling full from my dinner of hummus from Zoe’s kitchen (should I have eaten out?) and gauc from the back of the fridge (I shouldn’t have had extra for dinner. I should have planned better). I am looking forward to going to bed in a few minutes.
That’s a little tiring no?
How This Plays Out in Yoga
And let’s bring that mindfulness into the yoga studio. Imagine one student practicing yoga in a body that society tells, or more properly yells, is not the right size or shape. That student practicing mindfulness is experiencing the criticism over and over. And, that student watching themselves is missing the opportunity to be embodied: to have an experience all of their own, of their body’s strength and softness.
Curiosity can help get around the imbedded judgment and get to that embodied experience.
Curiosity in yoga might be as simple as your teacher asking you to see how a pose feels, instead of asking you to take it to the limit or to find your edge. Curiosity may also be to ask you to experiment with two or three options for poses or props and then decide which of the two you prefer. In those moments of play you alone are experiencing the poses. You alone are feeling what works for your body.
I liken my morning yoga practice to a morning meeting. Just as a morning huddle might start with a check-in, my practice starts with experiencing what is tight, what is hot, what is loose and what needs attention. I sometimes decide when to finish my practice by doing a similar inquiry of each body part: did my feet get to move and stretch enough? Do they need anything else? Did my calves and shins get what they needed in practice? How about my quads and hamstrings? The abductors and adductors? How about my back and core…
For these reasons and more, curiosity is a cue I work to bring into all my Curvy Yoga classes.
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Maggie Juliano has been teaching yoga since 2008 and Curvy Yoga since 2015. She loves to bring her creativity into the classroom to find new ways for students to connect to themselves. She has taught yoga as part of prison and rehab programs. She is also an attorney and runs a communications business. She is owned by the two most photogenic cats on the East Coast. Connect with Maggie on her website or Instagram. Also, check out her book Body Compassion: An Instructor’s Training & Resource Manual on Yoga for Eating Disorders, and keep an eye out for her upcoming book of writing prompts, 52 Prompts to Connect.